LOST CASE
I stroll down the streets aimlessly below the stars listening to "heart of a lonely roller" by my all time favourite pik which made me write down. ha ha. I recently lost my laptop forever.R.I.P.In any city of India you can't expect any troubleshooters when you are a miser like me that too without a "jugad".So i roam around the city in my favourite black lower and noodle top like a Loafer kicking cans and enjoying myself.But that's only when i don't think of my mobile reminders.I have a hell Lotta stuff piled up to finish.But i prefer to push it for tomorrow.I miss home but i am stuck enjoying my haunted hostel alleys.ha ha.So like everything is so computerised and we are so helpless.Life is no less than SAW traps where we all are held up in  different traps.ha ha!!
But is this inhibited or we are like that only??
As i walk by a middle age couple i noticed something quite rhetoric and mundane.The lost smile,kid  forced to speak English,the UN CLOSE couple.Why to mention because maybe this is the life.My laptop not getting fixed.WHY?You visit people and they make you go in circles.Why can't just we be simple and short and straight??That's why i keep delaying things with the fear that it can never be done.One day we get so frustrated by this system of people delaying your work and we delaying our work that we do wrong things.Recently one of my friend's friend cleared a high fi examination.She was supposed to be happy.But the 20 lakh fancy "display" in her "poor savings account" will decide her future not her IQ.Mind it all you intellectuals out there!!Now this really freaks me out as i have been recently into making passport caressing my foreign employment dreams.
Sometimes i hear this world screaming at the top of it's voice -MONEY,FAKE,CLEVER
My interviewer tells me "You lack confidence" with great confidence
I glare at his big mundane stiff face with my lost eyes and think to myself
"sir you can shuffle my pockets and you will hear chuckling sound,if  i would have been clever i wouldn't be sitting right in front of you and yup yup yup i may have lied a thousand lies,i would have been different me with different people i had in my life but that doesn't call me fake"
he sees i am lost, observes my silence and speaks in a low sarcastic manner with a grin -lost case!!

nothing much to tell
watched a movie which really inspired me
it told me that the world is filled with superficiality,hunger,blood,desire
what you gotta go here
is to change it real for yourself
challenge lies there!!

BABY  STEPS


Last 6 months of my life wasn't easy.It was hell.I was lost and some kind of loud numbness seeped into me by what i saw and felt.A broken heart,adaptability problems,anger,fuss created,death,bewildered mind.Short words to jot down but ask one who know it.I am not here to say that i am the queen of goodness.I am a human and i committed mistakes.But i am here to say that i was the most stupid person ever living on this earth.Thanks to my fate or god or who so ever is above watching me.Thanks for the bitter and hard experiences.I know there are many people living in this world who are emotionally & mentally disabled or going into deepression,losing hopes.I am not saying i am perfect now.But i know i am taking baby steps.I am "better" me.Now when ever i am free from my busy schedule and i scroll down the pictures of my past.It makes me sad and nostalgic.You go back to feel the air,to smell the aura,to feel the songs u heard that time.It gives you goosebumps and it makes you cry.Getting stuck in one place is no life.it Blocks your present.Niether so much anticipation of future is gonna help.You just have to do your today.Plan but don't get lost.
                       Try to know yourself and please try never to repeat your mistakes.Try to learn a lot from them.You will be the happiest.Life is all about balancing.you have to enjoy this video game before it gets over,grab the maximum points and win this game.Not to be taken seriously but to be sincere.Please don't push yourself too hard.Leave things that bother you in the first place.It's ok!Don't be afraid.

Life is taking baby steps 
....
 

After a long long long time i am again back ..
first "HAPPY NEW YEAR" to all...
It wasn't easy for me to start it all up again
...
as the layout has been changed of my new blog..so am i
i heard people change with time
i saw it
i felt it
i wept it
i laughed over it
anything you say..
i have just started
never back down
i hold myself now
i have seen it all
so i am over it
i still have low's and up's
but i have known this life
how it plays you
so how you play with it
!!